The Road Trip
by Atlanta Sunshine
Summary: [VERY OOC]Dumbledore is at it again with the whole 'House unity' crap. Now everyone will have to go on a road trip. Can Hermione survive with the evil, slytherin Prince Malfoy, the slytherin Princess Parkinson, hopeless Neville and a little weird Luna?...


**-The Road Trip-**

**Fabulous-Krista**

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Hermione sat in the car waiting on Malfoy to hurry up and get the snacks. It was their first day of the 2nd annual Magical Road Trip. Or the shit trip as she called it. Dumbledore just had to come up with this stupid house unity crap. It was so infuriating! She didn't get it. Especially why it was a road trip. Why couldn't be a magical authors tour, where they travel to find famous authors of her favorite books. No. They had to do this. She didn't remember when there was the first annual magical road trip. Maybe they didn't want to spoil it. Yea for us.

She leaned back into her seat and thought about the first time she had heard about the trip. Everyone was frantic or excited. The mudbloods the majority of the excited, they knew what a car was, but the pathetic pureblooded slytherins were the most to make the frantic side. They didn't want to be seen in muggle inventions such as the car or listen to such a thing called radio or even go on a trip with people. They hated everyone, even people such as themselves. There were lots of arguments. Ron and Harry were just worried about who they would ride with. Clearly she hadn't thought about that, Malfoy was in her car. Great. If she had known that she would have been right up there arguing with them.

"Fuck! Why won't this stupid little pump go in?" Pansy yelled into her ear. Of course the whole road trip part wasn't the worst of it. They're were five partners to go in each car. Malfoy, one. Her, two. Pansy, three. Neville, four, and Luna, five. She not only had to be stuck with the mudblood hating slytherin prince, but the mudblood hating slytherin princess, the dumbass, and the weirdo.

It was going to be fun. Neville was going to faint at least fourty times on this God forsaken one week trip. Luna would go on and on about bullshit that no one really cared about and then ask if she could give you a rainbow tatoo. She had already asked Hermione like twelve times since they left the school. It was getting annoying. Malfoy and Pansy would just bitch and bitch and bitch about how much they hated mudbloods and that they disgraced the magical world. Fuck them.

Hermione got out of the car and walked over to where Pansy was pushing and shoving a gas pump into the poor car's gas tank. All these pathetic non-mudblooded people pissed her off. It was a gas pump for Christ's sake. The thing sticks out, you stick the sticked out thing into the hole and pump. Idiots!

"Her let me help you." She offered

"I don't need help from you, you twit."

"Fine. Whatever. Don't let me help you, but at least hear me out when i say, I am the only one who knows how to do it."

"No. You'll screw up what i have done already."

"What have you done? Oh. Pulled it out of the holder? Great job. Now...hmm, do you know what to do next?"

"...Ugh, fine. Take it, i don't want it anyway..." Pansy tried to hand it to her, but it slipped from her grip and went crashing to the ground, it also pulled the handle causing gas to pump all over he legs and skirt.

"Arggg! Dammit! Oh, my new skirt! It's ruined. I need a towel. Ewww..." Hermione had stepped away causing none of the gas to spray on her. She was quite amused with Pansy covered in gas and screaming. She laughed a bit. She couldn't help it.

"Are you laughing at me?"

"No. Why ever would i do that?" Hemione put her hand over her heart and put on an a mock hurt face. Pansy just glared.

"Fuck you, Hermione Granger! Fuck you!" Pansy ran inside the gas station to find the bathroom and probably bitch to Malfoy about how infuriating the mudblood was. It was typical of her.

Luna rolled down the window and asked "What happened to her?"

Hermione turned around after she finish putting the pump away and said "Prissy little bitch thinks she can do everything." Luna laughed.

Hermione looked through the window and saw that Neville was sitting in the fetal posistion and shaking. "What happened to him?" She asked.

Luna looked back and saw Neville. "Oh. He heard yelling and it frightened him. You know me and him have kinda become buddies and all. I already know where he was born and..."

There she went again. Did it ever ocurr to her that sometimes people just don't care? Maybe they tried to say it, but she just didn't hear them with her constantly blabbering about bullshit.

Hermione looked over to the station and saw that Malfoy and Pansy were returning and they didn't look happy.

"Uhh...Luna. We gotta go now."

"But i didn't get to finish..."

"Well you can tell me later about how...uhh..."

"My grandmother actually sticks her foot in her cakes"

"Uhhh...yeah. Later."

"Okay" She rolled up the window and sat there talking to a shaking Neville.

Hermione closed the gas tank and made her way to the other side of the car and got in. The other thing about the road trip was that the car they got was a VW Bus. God forbid they live a little and buy an SUV or something. Maybe they just liked the mileage and that it would be less gas stops with that many miles per gallon. Great. More bonding time. It's not that she didn't love her travel buddies. She LOVED them, but hey, let's add on another twenty minutes of bitching about how much they loved each other.

"Oi, Granger!" And it starts.

"Yes, Malfoy?" She turned her head and looked at the blonde bafoon. He was right beside a fuming Parkinson, whose skirt was still exsuming gas fumes.

"Pansy says you sprayed her with the gas pump..." Pansy smirked that same damn smirk Malfoy owned. "...and even though i think that was a marvelous idea..." The smirk instantly turned to shock as she put her hands on her hips and gaped at Malfoy. "...but, that was incredibly immature and dumb of you to do so when you know that we both have more of a power than you and your stupid blood. I advise you to stay away from Miss Parkinson..." The smirk re-appears, and she cuts in. "...Or there will be hell to pay, mudblood."

God, it's so pathetic.

"What are you Malfoy, her daddy?"

"In some situations..." He looked over at Pansy and smirked a devilish smirk and she returned the same. He looked her up and down.

"...Eww...Anyways, i did not spray her with the pump she, her clumsy and prissy self..." Smirk dissapears again and is turned to a look of pure hatred. "...did that on her own. I merely laughed at the ridiculousness of it all. I advise that both of you learn about what it's like to be a muggle then you would know how to use muggle things. Idiots."

She returned to her posistion in the seat.

"Piss off, Granger!" She yelled.

"You know i would Parkinson, but i am kinda stuck with you in this car until we finish this fucking trip."

Pansy muttered "Bitch." and finished helping Malfoy put the food in the trunk and walked up to the front seat.

"I heard that." Hermione said as she put her seat belt on and started up the bus.

Pansy replied with a childish version of "I don't care." and started to put her seat belt on.

Hermione noticed this and couldn't resist. "Oh, finally decided to use something muggle created?"

Pansy looked at it disgusted, but thought about what Hermione had said earlier about how it saved your life at times. "Well, i'm not an idiot and i don't want to die. My life is too great to die this young."

"Oh my God. So you're saying you finally decided to listen to me about something. God, this is the happiest day of my life."

"Don't get too excited mudblood. It's not like you created it."

"Well i am part muggle. But hey, you don't have to wear it. It wouldn't be all that bad if you died."

"Bitch."

"Can we go now? I am sick of hearing this bitching." Malfoy said from his seat. He was laying down in the back on the long seat. Leaving poor Luna and Neville squished together on the small seat. But they wouldn't cross him.

"If your little girlfriend would admit that muggles are usefull." Hermione shouted.

Pansy exclaimed "Never!"

"She's not my girlfriend!"

Hermione started to drive out when Pansy turned around startled and said "But Draco! I thought we were."

"God you women and dating. I don't date!" He yelled.

Pansy turned around and said "Bastard. Just drive Hermione." Hermione almost wrecked.

"What? Did you just say my name? Oh God, I'm even more happy."

"Could you stop being a bitch mudblood? God i can't believe i have to be stuck with you for a week. I wonder how your little boyfriends Potter and Weasel will be without you?"

"Okay Parkinson, i have a lighter and you still have gas on you and if i light it, you will be no more. Got it?" She could hear Neville faint and Luna rushing to pick him up all the while Malfoy laughed at how stupid he was. One down forty to go.

That shut her up. Even though she didn't know of lighters, she knew of gas and how fire worked with them. She was smart after all.

Hermione got on the highway and drove. She thought of how Ron and Harry were doing. She wished she was with them right now. 'It would be better than this.' She thought. 'This is gloing to be a long trip.'...

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**Hey guys! I just came up with this and decided to write. Hope you like it, now review!**

**Luv F-K**


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